As an anxiety therapist in Chicago, IL who also works with couples, I was inspired to write this blog post after sitting with many first-time parents who came in wanting to improve their “communication skills.” Over the years, I’ve witnessed how the transition into parenthood doesn’t create new relationship problems — it magnifies the patterns that were already there.

If you’ve always been the responsible one, the peacekeeper, the one who keeps things running smoothly, becoming a parent can intensify that role. And somewhere between feedings, diaper changes, and managing schedules, you may start to feel like you’re disappearing.

If that sounds familiar, this blog is for you.